DVD Golden Corral: Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo

Ozone (Adolfo ‘Shabba-Doo’ Quinones), Turbo (Michael ‘Boogaloo Shrimp’ Chambers) and Kelly (Lucinda Dickey) are back in Breakin’ 2, one of the only sequels in film history made the same year as its predecessor. As our story opens, Kelly (or ‘Special K,’ and who I may have a crush on) has given up working on chorus lines and meets back up with her old breakdancing pals, Ozone and Turbo, who have started teaching at ‘Miracles,’ the local community centre, where underprivileged youth are taught to dance, box and mime (by a man who looks suspiciously like Will Forte). And while Kelly and Ozone seem to be dating now (must have happened in-between films), all is not well for our heroes. An unscrupulous developer has the community centre declared condemned so he can raze and replace it with a shopping centre, giving the gang only 30 days to find $200,000 for the necessary renovations. Add to that the threats of local toughs / rival breakdance crew, the Electros and some romantic tensions between Ozone and Kelly over their differing socioeconomic statuses, and we’ve almost got a story.

I can’t remember Kelly’s socioeconomic status being established in the original Breakin’, but in the sequel, she’s clearly a rich girl, with parents who play tennis and have servants and live in a mansion that may or may not be the house from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. The time Kelly spends with ‘street dancers’ causes her parents no end of pain. The culture clash comes to a head mid-movie when, in a nod to Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner, Ozone and Turbo show up for formal dinner in leather bondage dance wear. Kelly’s parents have invited her whitebread old flame, as well, and take the opportunity supper provides to inform our street-dancing friends that they don’t deserve money for the community centre, because their kind can’t handle money: ‘You mismanage it! Spend it on drugs! Fancy clothes! Cars!’

But don’t be fooled into thinking this is some gritty message film. That dinner scene comprises about the only five minutes of the movie that does not involve a dance number. The makers of Breakin’ 2 know you’re here for the breakin’, and they are all too happy to provide. If Breakin’ can be compared to the beginning of the television series Glee, Breakin’2 is Glee‘s second season, with only the barest lip service provided to a plot, but jam-packed with musical numbers, most of which describe the action on screen at the time. (A visit to the club Radiotron is heralded with a dance to the song ‘Radiotron,’ a dance-off between our heroes and rival Electros is set to the song ‘Combat.’) But what dance numbers they are!

The bravura, show-stopping hospital dance number (Turbo injures himself in an act of civil disobedience) is the one that will echo through the halls of history (and with good reason), but it’s not the only jaw-dropping dance scene. In an awkwardly long scene, Ozone tries to teach young Turbo the facts of life before resorting to teaching through dance (the better option, obvs). In an amazing feat of editing, the two men dance with a stuffed doll, Kelly and Turbo’s Latina crush at the same time (before fighting over said doll and ripping it into pieces, in a stunning display of unintentional misogyny). Turbo, who wowed audiences with his broom dance to Kraftwerk in the original, again outshines his co-stars, killing it with some zero-gravity breakdancing in his bedroom. It’s impossible to describe in full, but imagine that sequence in Sugar Ray’s ‘Fly’, but a million times better and with way fewer cuts (and without Mark McGrath, thankfully).

Second only to the dance moves is the fashion in Breakin’ 2. While this review is largely tongue-in-cheek, I honestly feel it would be difficult to overstate the influence of this movie on both dance and fashion. Ozone wears exclusively mesh shirts (except when eating pizza, which he does with no shirt and pants unbuttoned), Turbo rocks band-major wear and bandanas, while Kelly’s amazing outfits rely heavily on neon. (My favourite piece of hers is a set of handcuffs used as a belt for a denim skirt.) And when a young Ice T makes a return appearance (he was also in Breakin’), his backup crew, possibly the weirdest band of all time, appears to have walked over from the set of The Road Warrior. Accordingly, it seems fitting when no one applauds at the end of their set.

The culture clash and dance numbers build to a final confrontation at the community centre. When the bulldozers arrive to demolish Miracles, our heroes stop them the only way they know how – with dance! Eventually only, Turbo is left standing between the dozers and the community centre. His defiance recalls the unnamed man standing before a line of tanks in Tiananmen Square; Breakin’ 2 is probably where that guy got the idea. (Remember, Breakin’ 2 predates his brave act of defiance by 5 years.) The construction workers give up (‘I came here to do a job, not to kill kids!’) and the dance crew puts on one last show in an attempt to raise money to save Miracles: ‘There’s gonna’ be dancing and juggling … the whole works!’ After some media coverage, a massive crowd gathers, Ice T returns with a donation-themed rap and the electric boogaloo begins.

Worth watching?: most definitely

Best line: ‘We need your juice, Strobe!’